Impact

This morning
I woke up before the alarm
and thought:

"Oh goodness".

My dear friends,
I only have a week
before I journey away
to my Cedar City
and I haven't even
started packing, buying,
goodbyes....
or doing whatever else.

And guess what?
I work every moment
of my life until then.

AHHHH!

****

But can I say...
I probably had one
of THE best weekends
of my life this past week.

I can't even begin
to describe the love
I have for my dearest friends.

With them,
I am completely and utterly
a profound weirdo...
and myself.

It's amazing, really.

Who knew that
the crazy goon that
had been living inside
of me my whole life
was going to break free
when I met these kids?

We're all leaving
each other...
soon enough.

And can I be honest?

My heart is breaking.
Severely.

Don't worry.
I already have tears
streamin' down.

I know we have
our share of goodbyes
in our lifetimes
and we just have to learn
to get through them
and move on...

...but I can't do these ones.

It's the fear of knowing
if it's just a "see ya later",
or really a goodbye.

As I talked to one
of the dear friends
last night about my anguish,
he said,
"Ah, your life will be sustained
by a new happiness
in just a few months."

As true as that may be...
the happiness they bring me
is totally separate.

It's like two different stories.

So to say that isn't
quite fair.

Having talked to my
brilliant mother
who is practically the
same person as me,
she shared some deep
wisdom.

She said
that it is hard.
No doubt about it.
But we learn to find
a new joy above all else
when we start a new phase
of life, like marriage, let's say.

You just have to make sure
you really are ready to let go
and let a beautiful new love
and beginning start
that will take over everything else.

It's hard,
because they will always
be apart of you because they
helped you...
no, greatly assisted you
in becoming who you are today.

But now you have to take
what they so graciously gave you,

and live.

*Sigh*.

Though I know
every word she uttered
was profoundly true,
it's still hurts.

And I'll always care.

So,
it's up to me to
"make it so"
and make sure
it's not goodbye.

But definitely
"see ya later".

My dear boys...
Parker, Isaac, and Matthew.

I will miss you.


I am bubbling over
with joy
for the decisions you
have made to serve the Lord
for 2 years.

I know nothing could
make you all happier.

It has been a pure
pleasure to stand
beside you and explore
the wide world
and go on endless adventures.

I couldn't have done it
without you...
and I wouldn't be Ally Best
without your signatures
on my heart.

All my love to you
as you as you embark
on your
new adventures.

Love forever & always,
Little Besty